Ever Be Okay
by Fuzzball457
Summary: A short thing taking place directly after the pilot.
1. Ever Be Okay

**Author's Note: So I know a lot of people have done an 'after pilot episode' story, but I wanted to give it a shot. I know it's really short, but I just wanted to get it out there. I don't know if it's any good, but oh, well. I think I might write another short second chapter that will take place shortly after once they get back to the motel if I get good feedback. **

**P.S. I wrote this while listening to Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright and it might help set the mood if you listen to it while reading, just a tip.**

Sam stood by the curb slowly waiting for Dean to come back from the talking to the cops. _This isn't happening. This just isn't real. Jess is fine. She's going to laugh at me and call me silly for worrying so much when she hears about this. _Sam repeated in his head over and over. Hoping, no begging, no praying that it would soon come true and he would wake up room one of his horrible nightmares. There was just no way this was happening. His Jess, the absolute love of his life, was gone? No, no it couldn't be. But then again, why would Sam feel so utterly lost and miserable if it wasn't true? Would he really feel as though his very heart had been ripped in half if it wasn't real? No, this wasn't just over reacting. No this was true and absolute reality. Sometimes reality just sucked.

Sam nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Despite his hunter instinct's disapproval, Sam made no attempt to push off the offending hand, though, he felt just too plain old weak and exhausted.

"Sammy?" Dean bent down in front of Sam and held his chin in his hands. "Sam?" Slowly, very slowly, Sam looked up to meet Dean's gaze with big, round, pain-filled eyes.

"Oh, god, Jess," Sam said before his head fell back down and he began shaking with sobs. Dean pulled Sam forward into his embrace. He felt Sam's tears drip down onto his shoulder, saw Sam's whole body trembling, heard Sam's low, pain-laced sobs. It didn't feel right to Dean. No, his Sammy should never make such a noise, never be in enough pain to make such a noise. It just made Dean pull his beloved little brother in closer. He ran his hands over Sam's back in slow, comforting circles. "Its okay, Sammy, it's gonna be okay." But as Dean sat there rocking his broken baby brother, Dean couldn't help wonder if it would ever be okay again.

**Author's Note: So, what did you think? Let me know what you thought of this one and your opinion towards a short second chapter. TTFN (Ta-ta for now, those of you who don't know this need to watch a bit more Pooh Bear.) and thanks for reading! :)**


	2. Golden Slumbers

**Just thought I should let you all know, I did add a second chapter, I published it as a stand alone but I'll stick it here too.**

**The name 'Golden Slumbers' is the title of a Beatle's song which gave me the inspiration to write this. It's a very good song. Go have a listen, you know you want to! :)**

**I don't own the song or supernatural. No infringement intended. **

**Enjoy and please review!**

Golden Slumbers

The drive back to the motel was silent. Neither brother made a single noise, even the usually pounding music was turned off. Dean didn't know what to say. Didn't know what to do. Didn't know how to save Sam from the grief welling up inside of him. And Dean hated that more than anything, not knowing how to help his Sammy.

When they arrived at the motel, Dean slid out of his side and went around to Sam's side.

Funny, it was never the driver's side, it was always Dean's side. And it was never the passenger's side, it was Sam's side. It just was. Always had been, always would be.

"Sam?" He asked tentatively as he opened Sam's side door. Sam remained unmoving, frozen by the pain ripping him apart from inside.

"Sam?" He repeated again as he touched Sam's arm. As though jerked from a trance, Sam stood up and, without a single word, moved towards the motel door. Sam paused in front of the motel door, Dean had the key, and waited in silence.

Dean unlocked the door and pushed it open. Sam walked in and sat down on the edge of the bed furthest from the door. He dropped his head into his hands, his elbows resting on his knees.

"Sam?" He just wanted his brother to say something. Say something to assure him that, painful though it was, Sam would find a way to pull through.

"Don't" Sam said quietly. Not really what Dean had been hoping for.

"Don't what?" Dean asked. He didn't want to cause Sam more pain, but he couldn't avoid doing something if he didn't even know what he was supposed to avoid.

"Just don't." Sam said simply. He laid back on the covers and stretched out a bit, his hands still covering his eyes.

"Why don't you try to get some rest, Sammy." Sam slowly lowered his hands and turned his head towards Dean. His eyes were watery and filled with guilt and pain and anguish, but there was also trust and love.

"I'll be right here if you need me. I'm not going anywhere, I promise." Dean said.

A small, but true smile flickered on Sam's face. "I know, Dean."

And with that Sam drifted off into a silent slumber.

THE END


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